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I'm tempted to edit the title to "Why aren't wizards all homicidal maniacs?" but I guess that wouldn't be appropriate. :-) Anyways, I observe that all the examples in your question are about Harry; you should note that he's the hero of the story, which (in this sort of book) seriously constrains what actions the author can allow him to take. (Also, Expelliarmus is his specialty, the spell he's best at.) Your question might be improved with a wider variety of examples.